Therapy for Men in San Francisco and Online Across California
A lot of men arrive in my office having spent years being the steady one. Holding it together at work, in the relationship, for the family. Performing, always on, on guard, and quietly worn down.
I am Stephen Gundlach, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in Hayes Valley, San Francisco. Much of my practice is with men, including gay men and men from religious backgrounds. I work in person at 423 Gough Street and by telehealth video with clients anywhere in California.
Who this is for
Men come to me when they are:
- Feeling stuck, flat, or angry and not sure why
- Carrying stress from a demanding career or a career that no longer fits
- Navigating a relationship that has gone quiet, tense, or uncertain
- Facing midlife, a divorce, a loss, or a change in family life
- Working out their identity as a gay, bisexual, or queer man
- Working out what a religious upbringing gave them and what it cost them
- Wanting to be a different kind of partner, father, or son than what they were shown
You do not have to be in crisis to start.
How I work
I work with two lenses, cognitive and somatic: how you think about your life, and what your body does while you think about it.
I am warm, present, and active in the room, and my clients experience me as a real person rather than a blank screen. I ask direct questions and I say what I notice. I use humor when it helps.
I was a minister before I was a therapist. If the spiritual side of life is part of yours, I can work with it. If it is not, we leave it out.
What to expect
We begin with a free 30 minute consultation by phone or video. If we decide to work together, sessions are 50 minutes, weekly at first for most people. Some men come for a season to work through a specific situation. Others stay longer to change patterns that have been running for decades. Either is fine.
Fees
Sessions are $200 for 50 minutes. I am out of network with insurance and provide a superbill for reimbursement. A limited number of sliding scale slots are available. Please ask.
Questions people ask
I have never done therapy. What happens in the first session?
We talk. I will ask what brought you in, what your life looks like now, and what you want to be different. There is nothing you need to have figured out in advance.
Is therapy going to make me talk about my childhood?
Only as much as it is useful. We work with the present, and we go back to the past when it is shaping the present.
Do you work with gay men?
Yes. A large part of my practice is with gay and queer men, and I am an affirming therapist. I also work with straight men.
Can I do sessions from work or while traveling?
Yes, by video, as long as you are physically in California during the session. Many clients alternate between in-person sessions in Hayes Valley and video.
How do I start?
Book a free 30 minute consultation through the button at the top of the page.